It's not quite "Call me Ishmael" or "Howard Roark laughed", but this was an amusing first line to a newsreport in the Boston Herald:
"For much of last night’s game, Yankee Stadium took on the feel of Southie on St. Patrick’s Day due to the number of Bostonians left loaded in public."
It's amusing because the Red Sox left 15 men on base last night, and had the bases loaded at least three times during the game (without scoring).
'Course the Sox still won.
I broke down this week and got MLB.TV. There is a distinct possibility that this could push the completion of my Ph.d back by 6 months. (just kidding--I hope).